Investigate Death of Tens of Thousands of Eels

Target: Xi Jinping, President of China

Goal: Investigate mysterious death of tens of thousands of eels

China has recently experienced multiple mass animal deaths. Most notably, nearly 14,000 dead pigs were discovered in rivers around Shanghai. Now, reports indicate that tens of thousands of dead eels have washed up on the shores of Huizhou, a city in Guangdong province. Residents claim that there is a noxious stench throughout the area; the cause of this incident is still unknown.

Many suspect that the culprit is a subsidiary of China National Offshore Oil Company (CNOOC). CNOOC is currently in the process of “doubling its crude refinery production to 24 million barrels a day.” One resident states that “every day the refinery reeks, and then [CNOOC] says that emissions are within limit…its credibility is extremely low.” Yet, CNOOC insists that data indicates emissions and waste water have recently been lower than the legal limit.

It is plausible that the eels died of natural causes. Testing conducted by scientists invited to monitor levels each year have noted that “cold water, low oxygen content, and high salinity could have killed the eels.” One Huizhou resident claims that fish wash up on the beach like this every year. With that being said, the Guangdong Nuclear Power Station is also located in the region; this station produces about 50 tons of spent nuclear fuel per year.

Still, the nature of the incident has given the public “reason to be suspicious.” Disturbingly, some say that “government cover-ups of hazardous incidents aren’t uncommon.” Although this tragic episode may have a natural explanation, recent events and other circumstances suggest otherwise. By signing this petition, you are demanding a thorough investigation of the mysterious death of these eels. In order to assuage the concerns of Chinese citizens, the cause of this incident must be uncovered.

PETITION LETTER:

Dear President Jinping,

Your nation has recently experienced multiple mass animal deaths, including pigs, fish, ducks, and swans. Now, reports indicate that tens of thousands of dead eels have washed up on the shores of Huizhou.

Many suspect that the culprit is a subsidiary of China National Offshore Oil Company (CNOOC). Although some residents have complained about the stench of the refinery, CNOOC insists that data indicates emissions and waste water have recently been lower than the legal limit. However, the Guangdong Nuclear Power Station is also located in the region; this station produces about 50 tons of spent nuclear fuel per year.

It is plausible that the eels died of natural causes. Still, recent events and other circumstances have given the public reason to be suspicious. Furthermore, your citizens have made it clear that health and environmental standards are more important to them than economic growth. In order to help assuage your people’s concerns, I demand a thorough investigation of the mysterious death of these eels.

Sincerely,

[Your Name Here]

Photo Credit: logatfer via Flickr

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